dating

How To Break Up Without Getting Bruised

2015 seems to be the year of the break up, One Direction has devastated tweens everywhere by announcing that they are going to spend the year apart following their own dreams. Zayn Malik and Perrie Edwards split up after a whirlwind X Factor romance, Zayn Malik broke fan’s hearts by leaving One Direction earlier in the year.  Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner have shocked fans by breaking up and even Kermit The Frog and Miss Piggy have called it a day on their long lasting romance.

Breaking up in the lime light is more difficult than for us everyday folk simply because everybody is watching every step they make.  Some manage to break up in a sophisticated manner like Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin who announced their, ‘concious uncoupling’, a while back.  While others like Katie Price and Peter Andre have never resolved their differences and seek to humiliate each other whenever the opportunity arises.

Let’s face it breaking up is difficult, whether you are the one who does the dumping or you have been dumped, it causes heartache and issues where shared friends are concerned. Here are a few tips that won’t make breaking up any easier but will help you to find a way to end an unhappy relationship respectably.

  1. Make sure that you are certain that your relationship has reached breaking point.
  2. Break up in person (don’t be a cowardly celebrity and use text messaging or social media).
  3. Be calm and give warning by saying that good phrase, ‘We need to talk’.
  4. Explain how it is the relationship that is not working and don’t make it too personal.
  5. Give time to talk it through then part amicably (hopefully).
  6. Put distance between you and don’t be tempted to go back out with each other as it will all end in disaster.
  7. Go shopping and buy that Star Wars T-Shirt she wouldn’t let you wear.
  8. Spend your time with your friends.
  9. Date again only when you are ready.
  10. When you bump into her, smile and say hello and be amicable.

There is no real advice to help a break up to be less painful but as the clichés say, ‘Time will heal’, and, ‘There are pleanty of fish in the sea’.

Do Not Look At Your Smart Phone On A Date!

Can you imagine what life was like before you were in constant contact with the whole world?  Less than two decades ago people used to arrange to meet their mates and actually turn up on time.  Everybody used to talk only to the people in the room and resorted to tearing up beer mats or smoking cigarettes to occupy their fingers.  Today however we are in constant contact with our so called friends but often never meet them, when we do meet we are so preoccupied with the people who aren’t there that we might as well have stayed at home. It is fair enough playing with your smart phone when you are alone but to do it when you have company is frankly a bad move.

So many times you see couples sitting next to each other in the pub oblivious to each other’s existence, neither of them should have bothered meeting up in real life and opted to meet on Face Time instead. Imagine that you have plucked up enough courage to ask the girl of your dreams on a date so you can get to know each other better and the whole thing goes belly up because of your pesky smart phones. I am certain that couples leave after a first date and don’t actually know what the colour of the other person’s eyes are.

Getting to know someone is all about finding everything there is to know about them – we are not talking about what they tell you because anyone can big themselves up.  We are talking about the cute way they put their hair behind their ears or wring their hands when excited.  Does her face light up when she talks about her pet or her job?  Have you noticed that the purple in her skirt matches perfectly with the purple in her top?  Do you appreciate how much effort she has gone into looking good for you this evening?  Does she realise that you only have a flat stomach because you make sure you eat well and visit the gym regularly?  Has she noticed that you push your glasses back up to your eyes with your middle finger – just like Superman?

Next time you go on a date ditch the phones and enjoy the company of a human being who is captivated by what you have to say and really wants to get to know you better.  If it doesn’t work out you can just become friends on social media – but it is worth taking the time and effort to know the true colour of someone’s eyes.

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It’s Official Women Like A Man That Makes Them Laugh!

Always on classified ads you see the acronym GSOH (good sense of humour) as a way to indicate to a prospective mate that they may not be the most handsome person in the room but they will certainly make you laugh.  We also hear the phrase that, ‘a funny man can laugh any woman into bed’,  and that is generally true, as long as they are trying to be funny like Mr Bean or Rab C Nesbit.  A study by Stanford University scanned the brains of 22 children while they were watching a mixture of sensitive and funny clips. The girls showed a greater appreciation of the humorous clips than the boys. Basically the study concluded that boys are programmed to make girls laugh and girls are programmed to see the funny side.  This may explain why it is really difficult to be a female stand up comic because slap stick and complete daftness is really what men do best.

So gentlemen, if you want to attract a lady make her laugh but don’t expect her to participate in slap stick and other daft humorous activities because she is into far more complex humour.  There is nothing more attractive than a man who knows how to laugh at himself and doesn’t take life too seriously.

Funny T-shirt

To show a prospective date that you do have a sense of humour you could wear a humorous t-shirt like these Micky Mouse and Ernie & Bert ones from Logoshirt.  It may be a great icebreaker to start off a conversation.

logos

Wear A Funny Hat

We do think that this one may be a bit OTT but even just one with a little bit of humour will make you instantly more attractive.

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Don’t Try Too Hard

What ever you do quit while you are ahead – don’t keep trying to make laugh once you have succeeded or you will become irritating and you will not see her for a second date.

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Try not to be someone you are not, if you are true to yourself you will find a girl who will laugh at your jokes and care about you as well.

How to avoid a First Date Disaster!

You have finally caught her eye and not just spoken to her you have also managed to secure a first date with her – yippee!!!

life is looking good – great in fact especially as the World Cup is around the corner and the sun is starting to shine!

Hold your Horses

The very worst thing you can do is to dive into the date head first without making some preparation, so we will give you tips on the best type of preparation to make in terms of attitude, style, venue, l’amour etc.

Take the Reins

Most girls won’t admit it but they actually like their men to be decisive and sure of themselves, in fact just a hint of arrogance in a man can reassure her that he does have a brain and a backbone – too much of course would just result in her feminist instinct raising its judgemental head. Have a game plan and organise the venue, her interests and what clothing style into consideration so that you can tell her all of the arrangements in advance and there will be no awkward moments – also if she winces when you inform her of the venue you can make a swift rebooking somewhere more appropriate.  Apparently women love surprises but as with everything they like to be surprised and prepared. Remember be a gentleman not a caveman!

Choose an Appropriate Venue

Please please find out if she has any dislikes before you plan the date of the century because it could be a deal breaker if you take her to a steak house when she is vegetarian or to a rock concert when she would rather go to an opera.  A girl likes to feel relaxed and comfortable because it is so easy for them to become up tight when they feel edgy.

Look Tidy

Please please don’t fall into the trap of believing that your favourite scruffy jeans and Glastonbury t-shirt would impress her in the context of a first date.  You must take into account the fact that she will have been preparing for this date the moment it was arranged, she will have held crisis meetings with her friend on line and in the flesh regarding her beauty regime, dress, shoes, hair, conversation and many more topics that men are completely unaware of.  Remember after the date she will be holding an evaluation conference with her friends leaving no stone unturned so it is vitally important that you show that you have made an effort.

Blazing Saddles – well blazers

All of these references to horsey phrases are cool – just because you must be some kind of stud to need this advice in the first place.  We think that a blazer is truly the way to go because it can transform any outfit into a cut above the rest.  A blazer would definitely compliment any dress she may have chosen and will make you feel very smart and glad you made that choice.  Don’t be fooled into thinking that blazers are restrictive and stuffy because there are many designs to choose from that will suit the occasion and your own personal likes.  This Farah Vintage blazer is very stylish and tidy and would certainly please the lady you are dating.

blazer farah vintage

You have One Mouth and Two Ears

This is a popular phrase used by teachers and parents alike to the chatter box in the room who doesn’t listen to a word anyone has got to say.  Please take notice of this and listen twice as much as you talk by asking questions and listening to her answers.  Avoid intense subjects and discussing past relationships – you don’t want to put the fire out before it has ignited.

To kiss or not to kiss

If it looks like the timing is right and the opportunity is there then go for it – please don’t look as if you are going to kiss her and then change your mind – it can really destroy the moment.

If the date went well and you both really liked each other then get in touch with her – in this day and age playing the waiting game is so yesterday – girls have mobile phones these days!  They don’t have to sit by the phone all day any more waiting for your call!